- 1.Take a deep breathe
- 2. calm down
- 3. walk away
- 4. keep your thoughts to yourself
- 5.ease into your secret closet
As tempting as it may be to get your point across. Stop! Don't do it.
Christmas can be one of those holidays where couples either sink or swim. My earnest desire is to sail through this season without any ripples in the water in other words swim. In order to do this I must change some of the habits of yesteryear. I choose to no longer do the same things while expecting a different results. In order to accomplish this task I must be deliberate in my actions. Choosing to no longer fly on auto pilot. So with the season swiftly approaching. Here's a list of things I am choosing to do different.
1. To tell my husband the things I desire for Christmas.
2. Stay focused on the families needs and not spend over the budget.
3. Continue to bring joy into the home.
4. Pray more.
5. Spend less time complaining. And more time being grateful.
This is by know means an exhausted list. What are some of things that could make your Christmas more bright? While putting a smile on the face of your mate.
Today's norm is for the man to carry the women. In other words to be the head of the household. But what happens when the tide changes. When the roll of the wife becomes the husband and vice versa. Some years back I was faced with this reality. My husband health was hit. It was devastating. I was overwhelmed with the sheer magnitude of hats I had to fill. Every roll my husband had on a daily basis became mine. My to do list never stopped. However my load got a lot heavier in moment. Having to carry such a load gave me a clear prespective on what GOD means when he says the wife is the weaker vessel. It was not that I couldn't do the things I was required to do in that season of my life. I just came to the realization that men were built to carry heavy burdens mentally and physically. Though I was doing a great job physically. I was drained mentally and spirtually. It wasn't until I embraced the truth of GOD's word that says when you are weak I am Strong. Grasping hold to this truth I began to cry out to the Lord. Assuring him I was weak and needed his strenth to make it through those tough trails. The bible tells us to cast our cares upon the Lord for he cares for us. I must admit sometime my superwomen attitude acts as if I have things all under control. And there is exactly where my probelm begins. Control, the Lord has allowed so many situations and circumstances to help me understand He is GOD, Fully in control of every aspect of my life. Once I embrace this truth I find it is much easier to relax and allow GOD to be GOD. Sometimes one of my greatest weapons in Fighting4Marriage is to letting go. Putting GOD in the drivers seat of my life and me taking the back sit. Trusting He knows what He is doing and what is best for me. What lesson have you learned your marriage that you would like to share?
DeWanna Whitted #figting4Marriage #GOD'sway
One of the biggest assets in my marriage is the ability to come to an agreement. Not that we always see things eye to eye. We have learned it is best for us to we come up with a solution that benefits the both of us. I must admit sometimes it is difficult if both of us are not willing to see things from the others perspective.Sometimes it takes stepping into the others shoes to have a clear understanding of how they feel. It is then and only then can we stay on the same path. When we fail to walk in agreement satan tricks us into walking in different directions. It is imperative that as you fight for your marriage you beware of the wiles of the enemy. Here are some reasons he desires to keep us divided, he is aware that
Dewanna Whitted #Fighting4Marriage #GOD's way
1. Never forget the reason you came to this place in the first place.
2. The feeling you felt the day you said I do, keep those feelings fresh.
Once upon a time our husband to be ran far and wide to find the best ring for us the bride. He didn't even think of the cost he simply awatied the smile that would arise upon our face (and the special goody bag following the I do). As we stood at the altar and looked into each others eyes we promised to be there through:
1. For better
2. Or worse
4. Or bad
5/ For richer
6/ For poorer
7/ In sickness
8. In health
I know some have decided to write their on vows. Maybe somewhere somehow they hoped to avoid the real commitment that marriage entails. However it seems to me no matter the words you say as you stand at the alter. Secretly hidden behind the I do are those same words etched on the wall we somehow breezed past as we floated on the wings of love down the asile. So with an infux of divorce it goes to show there were some that missed the memo. Marriage truly is what you make it. It is a 24hr job, your first small business, a college degree, a team effort, and one band one sound. And it is only as strong as it's weakest link. But at the end of the day it is truly worth the fight. So put up your dukes and decide that since you were the one who chose to marry be the one who chooses to stay. Fight the good fight of faith.
1. Putting on the whole armour of GOD
2/ Pray for your mate
3. Pray for yourself to become what GOD desires you to be for your spouse
4. Ask for patience you will need for this journey called til death do us part
5. Stand on the promised of GOD
6/ Whatever you do remember you are to grow together not apart.
What ever you do FIGHT 4 Marriage
Have you ever saw a fight that wasn't filled with fans waiting to see it. Whether it be at school, in a mall, or in a ring when a fight breaks out you can always find someone somewhere watching. Many are standing waiting to see there opponent fight the best fight of his or her life. Some of the fans have placed big bets on their favorite opponent ensuring as their opponent wins they win too. Some have not only put top dollar on a high stake bet some have went above and beyond to have ring side seats. For whatever the reason their are a plether of people who would line up to see a good fight. No matter the what the odds. The same way that is true in our everyday life it is also true in the Spirit. Funny how with our mates we tend to have this invisible crowd of on lookers. Before you know it they began to chant softly in our ear fight, fight fight. Without notice if were not careful we began to appease the crowd. The witnesses that have gathered in hopes to see a good brawl. Then before you know it your mate has gained his on audience begining to egde him. Pushing him to say it, do it, feel it. The unthinkable act pushing each of us to perform in a way that will ultimately push us farther and farther apart. Without fail as both entertain the whispers in their ears they enter into the biggest fight ever. When she fights she is sneaky, cunning, and her scratches cut deep. He comes in strong, his words are bone chilling, his actions unnerving, his punches are deadly. The crowd is screaming if I were you, I wouldn't take this or that. And somehow if not careful we fall for it hook, line, and sinker. And were fighting so hard that we have lost sight of the real issue at hand. So what do we do to Stop this Madness. Simple take a good look at the crowd who has gathered in your ear. Who are they?
1. Are they chanting for your Marriage or against it?
2. Do they have the best interest of you and your mate?
3. Is their advice sound and biblical?
4. Have they secretly put bets down against your Marriage?
5. Or are they willing to step into the ring in between you both sacraficing their well being all to help you see Your Marriage is worth Fighting4?
Your Marriage is worth the a fight. So before you give place to the devil. Take some deep breaths, walk away. Think things through. Recall the moment you said I do. Remember the love, and passion you both share. Then ease into your secret closet and tell GOD all about it. Not just all the things you are right about but also the areas your wrong. Ask GOD to fix you first then ask God to work on him. Be willing to lye down on the bed first for a surgical procedure before your so willing to put your mate up their. Luke 6:41 sheds light on this by saying that why should we behold the mote in some one else eye and perceivest not the beam in your own. So today lets take a look at ourselves. And ask GOD to purify our hearts that we may love like him. And while he is working on us. Behind the scenes he will work on our mate. Bringing GOD glory because there is a great cloud of witnesses desiring to see you win in Marriage.
Tips for Fighting 4 Your Marriage
1. Commitment to love
2. A dependency on the Word of GOD
3. Don't allow the romance to go dormant. Keep the fire burning
4. When your up against the wall remember, the weapons of your warfare are not carnal but mighty through GOD.
5. Put on the full armour of GOD.
6.Put up your dukes and Fight, the Good fight of Faith.
7. In the end. You Win
Cause the battle is not yours it's the Lords'
Recall those days in elementary school when you passed the infamous love notes. Hoping they would never fall into the hands of your teacher, or in some cases the class big mouth. You only wanted it to land in the hands of the one who made your heart go pitter patter. Days when there was no doubt in your mind who you loved. It wasn't every boy in class. It was someone special. One you had your site set on for such a long time. Secretly you talked with him in the bathroom mirror. The club house in the woods became the place that you felt free enough to pretend that he was the Father of your make believe kids. When valentines day came around your parents took you to the store to purchase valentines gifts for all of your classmates, while in your heart you had only one in mind. When you came home unbeknowst to everyone you carefully opened the box looking for the best card that would let him know just how you felt. Patiently you waited for the day to pass out your cards so you could retrieve the ones given to you. On the bus ride home you were so antsy that you could hardly keep your cool. Awaiting the private moment to lock yourself in your room just so you could see if he had chosen a special card for you. Sadly to say twenty some years later you have a rude awakening, now you have kids of your own. And you realize all the cards in the box are the same. Lol. After all your efforts you made in the end it wasn't reciprocated. He never even noticed the difference between your card and the rest of the classes he just wanted the candy. Okay maybe that was my experience. Smile, anyhoo.
Today as I look back over my life I now comprehend why some marriages stay together and some don't. As I started this blog, I shared how I had my sites set on someone special. Though they were others in the class not one had your heart like he did. At and early age you came to the decision that the only one you wanted was him. In actuality you CHOSE to love him. It wasn't until years into my marriage that I took notice of this truth. In order for a marriage to work the two have to make a commitment in their heart and mind to choose to love. If you look around your neighborhood you will always say someone's lawn looks better than yours. But if you were to apply some of the same gardening tips to your flower beds you would be surprised how much your flowers would flourish. So instead of looking around at other yards that look better than yours. Begin to add some fertilizer (the word of GOD), plenty of water (Holy Spirit's guidance), make certain your marriage gets plenty of sunlight (Time spent in prayer asking GOD to teach you how to be a better mate in Jesus name) and if you need a boost add a little plant food not too much you don't want to overdue it (advice from seasoned marriages-wise counsel). Remember marriage is a process so give it plenty of tender loving care. Don't forget in many cases You (nobody forced you to marry) YOU choose your mate. Now when all the chips have fallen it's time for you to Choose to love. Til death do you part.
Fighting 4 Marriage
Hi, my name is DeWanna (pronounced: Da-Wah-nna) Whitted. Thank you for stopping by. 2Hearts1accordministries.com is your source of encouragement, inspiration and motivation in marriage. You will find blogs, resources and events designed especially with YOUR marriage in mind. My mission is to help YOU build a strong marriage able to withstand the test of time.